we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Randomize
