its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
