so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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