I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Randomize
