ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Randomize
