Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize