if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
