Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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