I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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