you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
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