I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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