You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Randomize
