Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
