I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
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