Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
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