i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
