The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
She announced her abortion via fbk
high people should be assigned attendants
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
