I wish life had little blips of pornography
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
