Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
