My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Randomize