dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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