i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
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