with your own penis?
I just made out with a guy for $7.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
