When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize