God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
