You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Randomize
