T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
