I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
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