can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
