And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
