the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize