so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize
