THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I love you. Go after that dick
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
