Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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