he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
