Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
