the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
