why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
birth control should be required to get into college
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
