what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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