Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
