You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Randomize
