On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
organizing the empties. That sober.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
