we're making bets on your personal life
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
