weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize