I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
