your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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