Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
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