is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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