I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Randomize
