I must be too annoying 4 u.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
