But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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