i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
